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Post by NinjaDeathStrike on Mar 14, 2011 1:45:21 GMT -5
Journal #1: One step closer. We’re closing in on our prey. Today was the most difficult step yet, but we made it. Kitsune made contact with Zero last night. They had one last assignment for him before he was able to meet the Fox. We needed to head to Saffron so Zero could meet with Mr. S. Zero also told us that Kitsune was planning to take Faye and me out when we got to the city. We arrived and sure enough, were soon attacked by an assassination squad while Zero continued on to the mansion. It was four on two, but Faye and I were able to defeat them. Meanwhile, Zero met with S. Zero was supposed to blow up the Mayor’s mansion, with the Mayor and a large number of other political targets inside. Obviously Faye didn’t want to go through with it, but Zero was determined. It was the easiest way to the Fox he said. And he was right. I didn’t really care about those people. Who were they to me? We returned to the PC while Zero planned his attack. Faye grew restless and wanted me to think of a way to avoid killing all of those people without ruining our chance to discover the identity of the Fox. The only thing I could do was put her into contact with Zero, who was already beginning his mission. Faye and Zero argued back and forth until they came up with a plan to stage the explosion and lie to Mr. S. Zero wasn’t happy about it, but he relented. I could understand his concern. This was a big risk with no promise of a payoff.
The Mayor was hosting a fundraising party that night and Zero and his team were already in position near the mansion. If we wanted to stop them, we needed to crash the party without alerting the Kitsune members inside. We went to the retail district in Saffron and bought some clothes to fit the occasion. I chose a black tux with a long black tie. I have to say, I was pretty impressed with how good I looked in it. Faye chose a black dress and jade necklace and bracelet. She looked radiant, absolutely stunning, even though she had picked a dress that hid the scars on her arms. I barely even notice them anymore, but she didn’t want to draw unwanted attention to us, and the party goers sure as hell would have noticed. We walked back to the mansion and I ‘convinced’ a couple of the party goers to hand over their tickets. Zero told us to hurry, and we headed inside. The interior of the mansion was beautiful and the party guest danced and chatted happily. It was like a whole other world. For an instant I just wanted to forget about the Kitsune and the mission and everything else and simply enjoy the night out. I could see myself letting my guard down, dancing with Faye, eating the food, being a part of this world, but I didn’t dwell on the thought. That’s not why we were here. We immediately headed for the elevator to the basement.
There we surprised Zero’s team who had just finished planting the bombs. We battled and were easily able to win. Two of the Kitsune fell in battle, but one of them, a girl, had survived. She was unconscious and likely had at least a serious concussion. While Faye and Zero argued about what to do with her, I cut her throat. Zero was angry with me and I didn’t understand why. She was our enemy; it was too dangerous to leave her alive. She was already as good as dead, I just finished the job. I didn’t relish in her death, this wasn’t the monster; it was just a calculated maneuver. For someone who was willing to blow up an entire building full of people, I could not understand why Zero was so upset by one woman’s death, a woman who moments ago had been trying to kill him. Then I remembered the way he had acted towards the pretty trainer I used to burn down the green house yesterday, and even how we had been with Rochelle, and I understood. With the other agents taken care of, we evacuated everyone from the mansion and then blew it up.
Zero was told he could now meet the Fox, and Faye and I followed him and S to Fuchsia. We waited in the PC while Zero met with her. Faye and I couldn’t see anything that happened there, so we had to trust Zero. That hasn’t been easy for me since the incident at the Kitsune base outside of Viridian. I just hoped he would make the right choice and not be swayed by the Fox and S. Zero told us that he had gotten the answers he came for, and he revealed the Fox to be Kiyo Kasumi, the Fuchsia City gym leader. She was heavily guarded, so we decided to convince her that she needed to escape the city to get her away from the majority of her guards. The plan was that tomorrow morning on the way to the gym Zero would tell her Faye and me were coming to get her and convince her to head away from the city. We would attack on the road. The plan was made, now we just had to wait to spring the trap. Journal #2: I’m happy. Maybe for the first time ever, I’ve earned a small measure of peace. We’re on the island. Faye, Zero, and me. Together. Triumphant. Today was the culmination of the plan that we made together all those weeks ago after Rochelle died. Kitsune, like Giratina and the Oni, is finished.
Faye and I woke up early this morning. Faye looked different, steely and determined. All the softness had gone out of her. We sat and waited for Zero’s signal together. Before long, he told us they were on the move, and we raced to intercept Kiyo’s carriage on its way to Saffron.
We caught up to it and disabled it easily. Kiyo emerged along with S, Zero, and one other guard. Kiyo was incredibly beautiful, and I immediately became worried that Zero was going to betray us if we tried to hurt her, or refuse to help like he had in Viridian, leaving us out numbered. Kiyo looked over Faye and me and addressed us briefly before the battle. She knew who we were. She taunted Faye about her scars. I stepped in behind Faye for support, and the battle began. Faye dealt with S first since he was a psychic, and I took on Kiyo and her guard. I was outmatched two to one and I asked for Zero’s help. This time he didn’t hesitate to join in, sending out Shadow. I quickly manipulated the guard into killing himself and Whisper and Shadow took out Kiyo’s team while Faye knocked out Mr. S. At this point Zero refused to attack Kiyo and stepped away, but at least he had helped even the odds. Kiyo began to attack me herself and I could do nothing to defend against her. I know how to handle a weapon, but Kiyo was in another league. She was everywhere. I managed to avoid a few of her attacks, but she continued to land cut after cut with her twin Sais, so fast that I couldn’t keep up. And then Faye stepped in front of me. Foolish, brave Faye who was determined to put herself in harm’s way for me. As much as I hated it, I knew I stood no chance against Kiyo, so I backed off as Kiyo and Faye began a fight to the death.
The girls clashed weapons again and again, Faye with Dawn’s Tears, Kiyo with her Sais. At first it looked like it would be a quick match, Faye got the best of the first few exchanges, leaving Kiyo was some deep cuts. Between each volley, Kiyo taunted Faye. The things she said were horrible. She mocked Faye’s appearance, threatened to kill me or Zero, or to make Faye watch while she seduced us to her side. I don’t usually get angry, but I wanted to jump in and rip Kiyo’s throat out with my bare hands. It took everything I had to restrain myself. Faye’s look grew cold with hatred as she pressed her attack. Then Kiyo countered and nearly killed Faye in a single blow, stabbing into her shoulders. Somehow Faye managed to avoid her next attack and cut Kiyo’s back. Both girls were with dripping with blood and barely standing. They lunged at each other one final time…
…and Faye won. She drove Dawn’s Tears through Kiyo’s stomach, as Kiyo drove her Sai into Faye’s shoulder, where it stuck. Kiyo stumbled backwards clutching her stomach. She collapsed to the ground and began to cry, repeating the words “I don’t want to be alone,” again and again before she finally died. A different person may have pitied her then, but I simply took in the moment passively, and considered her final words. I don’t want to be alone. I wasn’t alone. Faye was alive. Faye was here. Faye had risked everything for me and we had walked through the valley of the shadow of death together. I had Faye. Zero was true. Zero had proven himself when we needed him most, forsaking his past to help his friends. I had Zero. Faye stood stupidly, almost in shock. Her own blood was running down her arm onto Dawn’s Tears and mixing with Kiyo’s. I ran to her side. I wanted to tell her to forget about everything Kiyo had said and not to worry, but she was barely coherent. Kiyo’s Sai was still sticking out of her shoulder. I pulled it out and wrapped the wound as best I could. Then I helped Faye sit in the grass until she was ready to stand. I helped her onto Hate and we slowly flew to Cinnabar. Faye said she wanted to go to the island, but I wanted her to be taken care of first.
Once we got to Cinnabar I carried her inside where Joy took her back to the ER. They wouldn’t let me in. I tried to get to her numerous times but they wouldn’t let me. Finally I resigned myself to pacing the lobby. I don’t know how long I waited there. Time didn’t matter. Nothing mattered but Faye. Finally, Joy helped her into the lobby. She looked weak, but at least she was alive. Zero arrived at about this time too. Held told me he had finished off S, something I had neglected in my haste to help Faye.
The three of us left Cinnabar and went to the island. We started a fire and just sat and talked. I was so happy. Am so happy. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. My plan worked, and my friends were alive. As we talked I lay back in the grass and stared into the night sky, enjoying the feeling of the soft ground on my skin. I turned and just watched Faye for a bit. Watched her sitting by the fire, just happy to have her close. I asked Zero about his plans for the League. He still plans to challenge, which is good. I can’t wait to see him compete. Soon enough everyone began to doze off. I got up and walked to the beach with Whisper for a bit. It’s where I am as I write this. I’m just watching the waves crash into the shore, enjoying the nothingness of tonight. I know that tomorrow will be different. It will have its own battles and a whole new kind of trial for the three of us, but tonight...tonight is ours to savor.
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Post by NinjaDeathStrike on Mar 16, 2011 23:20:13 GMT -5
Journal: Today…today was a good day. I slept better than usual last night. The dreams came again, but like the night in the forest, I felt like I wasn’t alone in my struggles. I turned to face my fears, and battled them through the night.
And then I woke up next to the remains of the campfire from the night before. It had burned itself out and only a pile of ash remained to mark its brief but beautiful existence. As I fully woke up, Black padded over and decided Faye’s face needed a morning scouring. She woke up clean, if moist.
I went through my belongings and realized most of my clothes had numerous rips and cuts, so we decided to go shopping in Saffron. We went to several clothing and supply stores. We picked up some much needed clothing and were even able to buy some camping supplies for the island, meaning we won’t have to rely on the hospitality of the PCs anymore. In one of the stores I broke up a cat fight for the sleeping owner, only to have him wake up and hit on Faye. I offered to kill him with my brain instead, which he didn’t seem to keen on. Finally we bought some supplies and books so that we can get started building a house on the island. Neither of us knows anything about building a house, but it doesn’t matter, we’ll find a way to get it done. One of the shop owners was also willing to put us into contact with some people that might be able to help.
After a full, but relaxed day, Faye and I returned to the island. We were just in time for sunset. The island. Our home. My first real home. I’ve never had that feeling of ‘home’ before, even when I was young. My house was just a place I put my things, my parents: just people I lived with. I didn’t feel any connection to any of it. Not like I do here. Not like I do with Faye. We talked briefly about what could have been, had we not met. I would be in a very different place…I was ready to stop fighting the monster and let it take control. I was convinced it didn’t matter, that I didn’t matter, that I could never be real. As we sat on the beach, watching the blazing red sun go to rest across the waves, Kiyo’s final, dying pleas of “I don’t want to be alone,” echoed once again through my head. That was me once, begging inside “I don’t want to be alone.” I’m not alone. |
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Post by NinjaDeathStrike on Mar 19, 2011 6:33:53 GMT -5
Journal: Well the vacation is over. It was nice while it lasted, but today it was back to violence and problems as per usual.
The day started with a trip to Fuchsia to visit Sally, the only survivor from the boat fiasco that cost me my life. While we were there, we met up with Mike. He mentioned going on a short cruise, which seemed like a great idea. Of course, when we got there, we found Jenny and the KDF, meaning that any chance for a relaxing day went right out the window. It seems that after the last attack, someone else had the bright idea to hijack another ship. Luckily these guys weren’t Oni or Kitsune, just a rather disorganized group of bandits in over their heads. Faye was able to sneak aboard and let us up easily. There was a small skirmish, but it ended quickly, and I was able to manipulate one of the thugs. The four of us headed to the lower deck.
We tried to sneak across the hallway there, but my slave tripped and fell, causing a commotion. As I watched him fall in slow motion, I was overwhelmed with a sense of déjà vu. I remembered being on the ship before, Jans alerting the guards, fighting, dying. I was determined not to let it happened again. I ordered everyone but the slave to hide, and was able to put the minds of the other men on the ship at ease. With that screw up avoided, we planned our attack. Faye would take on the leader in the smaller room, and Mike and I would storm the larger one, using my psychic powers to even the odds for our fight. We succeeded. Mike took a few hits, but all-in-all the fight went well. Faye finished her fight too, and let me know she was ok. One of our guards had been killed, but all of the hostages were intact. Score one team us. Mike and I untied the hostages, and one of them, a guy named Hakai thanked us. I replied politely, but was slightly distracted. I knew I didn’t have much time…but maybe…..
Faye came back to us, herding the captain before her. I told her and Mike to go back to Jenny with the hostages, while I headed into the room to pay the group’s leader a visit. He was unconscious when I found him, but I woke him up by slicing through the tendons in his ankles. I knew I didn’t have a lot of time or a lot of options. This one needed to be quick…and relatively clean, to prevent arousing suspicions from the police. I made my cuts precisely, making them look like something he could suffer in battle. I went as slow as I dared, trying to absorb the pain and terror coming from the man’s face. And then it was time to end it…too soon, but I dare not linger any longer. The others would be waiting, and Jenny would want to come aboard and inspect the scene. I held the knife above the man’s chest, and slowly drove it in, completing the kill. With a slow breath, I savored the moment, and then headed back up on deck to meet the others.
We got our pay from Jenny, and then talked a little bit with one of the survivors. Hakai, the guy who had thanked us on the boat. He seemed confused as to where he was. Apparently, he had been in Hoenn the last he remembered. He seemed to take the whole situation very well though, and asked if he could tag along with us. I’m not one for picking up strays, but I didn’t see the harm, at least not for the rest of the day. Together, we headed to the PC to heal. Faye went to the bathhouse to clean up a few of her cuts, Mike wandered off alone, and I talked a bit to Hakai. Turns out the guy is blind. I thought there was something off about him, I should have noticed sooner. This will…complicate things. I don’t know how I feel about having a blind person around, not that I care that he’s blind, but I don’t know how he can hope to survive some of the things we get into. Our group isn’t safe for anyone, much less a blind man. I’m not going to tell him he can’t come along, but if he gets himself killed…
By this time I realized Faye had been gone a long time. I reached out with my mind and found hers. She assured me that everything was okay, but I wasn’t convinced. Black started to whine as well, confirming my suspicion. I tried to convince Faye to let me help, but in typical Faye fashion, she was determined to deal with it herself. She got frustrated and I let the issue go…for now.
Once Faye rejoined the group, we decided to go to Saffron. I took Mike on Hate and saw Faye storm out the door before we took off. I didn’t wait up. If she didn’t want help, fine. I’d let her be. Mike and I arrived and headed for the weapons shop without waiting up for Faye and Hakai. On our way back, I tried to ask Mike about how he was doing since he got back from the underworld, but he was pretty tight lipped. Finally he told me about his dream. His involved something that happened to him back in Hoenn before he came to Kanto. He was hunting his brother’s murderer. He said he wanted revenge. I could understand that. If someone hurt the people I cared about…the things I’d do to them wouldn’t be pretty. I told Mike that I understood his desire to kill the man responsible for his brother’s death, but I also warned him about the consequences. Becoming a murderer isn’t a decision that should be taken lightly.
I returned to the group and rejoined Faye and Hakai in mid-conversation. Maybe I joined in…I don’t remember. We ended up in Lavender, at the Café. I ordered some food while Mike talked to Daryll about a trade and Hakai turned in for the night. Faye was barely able to eat, and left to go sit outside before Mike and I finished. I took Mike along to Sam Jax’s stone hut to ask about getting some foundations laid for the house on the island. He offered me a pretty good price, and agreed to have a look at the land at the start of next week. Mike headed to the PC as well, and I went back to find Faye and Whisper.
I found Faye sitting outside of the café; her face was completely drained of color. I frowned and suggested we head home for the night. Once we got to the island, I told Faye to sit down and tell me what exactly was going on. She started, but couldn’t even get the words out, so I went into her mind to see for myself.
It was bad. Worse than I thought. It was a dream, or had been, though it changed to accommodate me. Faye was there, trapped. And Kiyo, in the shape of a fox…and me. Kiyo knew she was in control. She taunted Faye and egged me on, knowing she had nothing to fear. Then another version of myself immerged by her side. Kiyo told me I was helpless, but I tried to fight anyhow. I tired putting myself between Faye and the dream me, but he simply disappeared and slipped past me. No matter what I did, I was unable to stop it. I fought uselessly against Kiyo as she toyed with me while my dreamself tortured Faye. I threw her off just in time to watch Faye die. I ran to her side and held her hand as she faded, but there was nothing I could do to stop it. I was useless. I watched the life leaving her eyes. Death…death is something I’m very comfortable with, but not like this. I usually savor the moments I get to watch the light leave someone’s eyes, but here it was torture. An eternal moment of torment that’s I’ll never be able to forget. Faye’s face in that moment still haunts me now. My hands are shaking so badly I can barely write. After Faye was gone, I stood slowly and turned to face the fox. She grinned and taunted me again, trying to get under my skin like she had with Faye, but that at least I could prevent. I turned the table on her. I made her worry. I made her weak. I planted little seeds of doubt into her head as I told her she was insignificant and all alone. Hopefully tonight when Faye faces her again, she’ll be off her game.
I withdrew from Faye’s mind to find myself back by the campfire. Faye was as pale as a ghost and cold like death. I scooped her up and gently shook her awake. When she was ready, we talked about what I had seen in there, and about her doubts. I did my best to reassure her. I don’t know how she could think I would ever betray her, but I tried to quell her doubts. Hopefully I gave her the strength to face her dreams tonight. No matter what happens, she won’t be alone. |
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Post by NinjaDeathStrike on Mar 20, 2011 18:19:57 GMT -5
Journal: Dreams. It’s strange the powers dreams have. To show us ourselves at our best, or worst. To reveal sides of us that have lain dormant our whole lives. Two nights. Two dreams. One more step towards feeling human. Saturday’s dream was the worst dream. It was a new simple kind of horror that I had yet to experience. I was in the mist with Faye’s body. All night. Alone. No matter what I did, I couldn’t get away from it. I tried to walk and run and close my eyes, but it didn’t do any good. Faye’s body was always there, the claw in her back, dried tears on her cheeks, a trickle of blood running down the corner of her mouth, and her eyes. The cold lifeless eyes looking at me. Judging me. “You did this,” I could almost hear them say. The dream lasted the whole night, and I woke up exhausted.
Whisper was sitting on my chest, batting me with his paw. I slowly got up and got ready, and Faye met me outside shortly afterward. We headed for Lavender where we met up with Mike and Zero. Zero decided that it was time to challenge the league, and so we all flew to the Indigo Plateau together. Zero entered the tournament and Faye, Mike, and I headed to the stands. The stadium was immense. The biggest manmade structure I’ve ever seen. Thousands of people lined the seats screaming and cheering. Zero did very well, though he had a few close calls, especially in the early round. Faye and I cheered him on excitedly, but Mike seemed out of it. He barely spoke and at one point just got up and left. Faye tried to find out what was wrong, but he wasn’t talking. I had tried to get him to talk yesterday, but I wasn’t going to force the issue. Instead I watched Zero win. During one of the intermissions Faye failed hilariously at cotton candy. Zero finished the tournament in first place, which meant he got a shot at the champion.
Zero’s battle was a close one. He fell behind early due to the champion’s Machamp destroying almost half of his team. From there, he was in a hole that he couldn’t get out of. By the time he sent out Shadow, it was one on three. Shadow fought valiantly, but he couldn’t overcome all of the champion’s pokemon. When the champion sent out his Latios, I knew it was over. It KO’d Shadow in a single hit. I left the stands to wait for Zero at the exit. I expected him to be dark and surly, but to my surprise, he seemed to handle the loss well. He even suggested doing something fun! We ran a few errands first, and then headed to the Sea Foam islands.
We climbed one of the smaller peaks, where we found a group of ice pokemon playing in the snow. I wasn’t at all happy to return to winter, but having my friends nearby and having Zero in such a good mood made it bearable. We all took sides and Faye and I were able to beat Zero and Mike. Afterward we had a snowball fight of our own. Zero has a good arm, I think I might have a bruise. Eventually our party was broken up by a group of hungry Mightyena. They were snow white and came stalking out of the woods. If I hadn’t had Nite, I definitely would have caught one. I’m glad I didn’t though, as the other poekmon rewarded us for helping them. I got a Snowrunt. I named her Yuki Onna. The others each picked their favorites as well. With that down, we headed for the island.
We were all tired, Mike especially. Like usual, he wandered off by himself. Faye tried one more time to get him to share, but he only mumbled a few words before passing out. At this point, I don’t know what to do with him. He won’t talk to anyone. Won’t tell us what’s going on. I’m not very personable to begin with, and with someone making me try this hard…not going to work. Maybe Faye can get to him, but I wash my hands of the situation. I gave him my advice yesterday; he can do with that what he will.
With the day finished, I talked to Faye about her dream again. I wanted to know how she could think that I would ever side with Kiyo. Didn’t she trust me? When I asked her about it, she told me it wasn’t really me I had seen in the dream. Not the me I am now. It was her vision of me…if I had sided with Kiyo. If I had never met Faye and instead remained with Kitsune. This was a new development; usually the dreams were after effects of the things we had already seen. But this wasn’t. This was something Faye had created for herself. Which meant that she had control over it, that she could beat it. Together we went into her mind again, to stop the nightmare, or die trying.
I began in the same black emptiness where I had been the night before, and found Faye there unconscious, just as I had been before. She could hear me, but when I tried to help her up, my arm passed right through her. I knelt down and helped her focus, and with her concentrating and my psychic powers I was just able to make myself solid. I helped her up and prepared to face Kiyo.
She showed up right on time, in her fox form. I didn’t give her any time to talk though and lunged at her before she had a chance to fill Faye’s head with any kind of doubt. She was too fast. She easily avoided me. I kept up the attack, trying desperately the keep the pressure on and prevent her from summoning the other me. It didn’t work. Kiyo was slowing but she was able to leap away and bring the Dream Ninja forth. He went straight for Faye and I was powerless to stop him. Faye was faster this time, able to fight back, or at least survive. I concentrated on Kiyo. She tore up my leg and back, but eventually I was able to beat her. I pulled her to myself and stepped on her throat, choking her out. With Kiyo out of the picture for the moment, I tried to help Faye, but I still couldn’t touch Dream Ninja. He was just as strong as me, just as fast. Whatever I tried to do, he countered it. With no other options, I pulled the unconscious Kiyo to me and yelled to Dream Ninja, hoping to distract him. When he looked up, I snapped Kiyo neck. I was hoping Faye would lunge in and attack, but she was too slow. Dream Ninja stated to pull her in. I tried to wrestle her from his grasp, but I could see the two forces tugging on her were going to tear her apart. I let go and just tackled her out of the way, trying to shield us both. It wasn’t working. He was coming. Finally, Faye told me to let her go. Reluctantly, I acquiesced…
…and Dream Ninja impaled Faye, punching the whole way through her stomach. This couldn’t be happening, not again. I was powerless. Faye was going to die…because I wasn’t strong enough to save her. She told me to press my attack, and I charged in screaming in anger and sorrow. I slammed him to the ground, my rage fuelling my strength. I’ve never been angry like this before. It was a new emotion. I used it. I overwhelmed Dream Ninja. I slammed his head into the ground again and again until his skull was nothing but a puddle of blood and bone fragments. Finally, the rage left me, and I sat over his body staring at nothing, feeling nothing.
Then I heard Faye’s voice behind me. It was weak, but she was still alive. I helped support her…but that’s all I could do. She was fading fast. She hugged me and I could feel the life slipping away from her. I couldn’t lose her. I would have nothing without her. But I was helpless to stop it. All of my powers and cunning meant nothing. Faye was going to die, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I lost it then, and wept as she faded away. But then, the scenery shifted. We were back in the meadow. I lowered Faye slowly down to the ground. A warm breeze blew, and her wounds were healed. I was happy but completely exhausted. The battle had left me utterly drain of power and my head was throbbing. Faye and I decided to spend the night in the meadow, since the sleeping bags were being used anyhow, and the spot by the fire in the real world seemed like as good a place as any to spend the night. I fell asleep exhausted but relieved, and content. |
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Post by NinjaDeathStrike on Mar 26, 2011 19:03:52 GMT -5
Journal: “What you need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened, it has all worked together to bring you to this very moment. And this is the moment you can choose to make everything new. Right now.”
I hope this is true, more than anything. No matter what I think, or try to tell myself however, deep inside I fear that my past and future are one in the same. That this present moment is only a deep breath before the plunge back into the darkness.
I don’t spend a lot of time dwelling on my past. There is nothing there that I wish to revisit, but when Faye asked to see it, I knew I was going to have to face what I had done. I had promised her a journey through my mind since I helped her deal with Shadow Faye, and the time had come to make good. After Sam brought his crew over to begin laying the foundation for the house, we retired to the tent, and headed into my head.
Because Faye wasn’t a psychic, I had to help her access my thoughts. I had to be the guide. I had to watch it all happen again, and then hope Faye didn’t hate me for it. We started with Aki, a tale I’ve already relayed in a prior journal, and won’t repeat again here. I watched Faye’s reactions the whole time, but they were hard to read. Once the scene was over, we stood quietly for a moment, there didn’t seem to be much to say. So we pushed on…to Mona. A slew of scenes from highschool. The price Mona paid for being with me. The end and then the funeral. Faye seemed pained and distraught throughout the whole encounter. Seeing it all play out again was…hard. Of all the deaths I’m responsible for, Mona is the only one I regret. It wasn’t her fault; she paid the price for my inhumanity. She was innocent, and young, and full of life, and I destroyed her. I obliterated her life and dreams and happiness, because I was less than human. A soulless abomination trying to fit into a world that didn’t want me and could never understand me. I should have been the one to die, not her. Showing that to Faye was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. The entire time I wanted pull back and soften the truth, but I knew she needed to see everything. It was a much a warning as anything else. That this is what happens when I try to reach beyond my grasp and be something I’m not. Faye needed to understand the danger. After Mona’s funeral I returned us to the space I had set up between the memories. Faye asked if I needed a break, but I knew dwelling on the scene wouldn’t help anything so we pushed on.
Next was my first kill, in Goldenrod, after I left home. It was the first time Faye had actually watched me make a kill. It was hard for her to watch, but she toughed it out. There were many more I could have shone her, but there was no need to prolong this part. There was only one more that she needed to see. The last, before I had met her. The one where I almost gave in. I made it as brief as possible, but Faye got the picture. She saw where I had been headed. With my past laid bare, there was only one thing left for her to see…the monster.
I didn’t want to let it near her. I knew it wouldn’t harm her, but the thing is sly and devious. It doesn’t deserve to see the light of day, or to have access to the person who I care about more than anything. Still, Faye was determined, so I brought her to it, and then it was in charge. It was back in the alley in Goldenrod, enjoying the memory of the mugger I killed there. When it saw Faye it recognized her immediately. Its eyes grew hungry as it took her, and it welcomed her warmly. It had wanted to talk to Faye for a long time, but I had purposefully been keeping the two as far apart as I could. It laughed at Faye’s desire to help me. It told her how I was. It told the truth, I am a broken sorry excuse for a person. I’ve known this for years, but hearing it put so plainly broke through the barriers I’ve built to insulate myself from despair. I knew it was talking to me just as much as it was talking to Faye. It wanted to make sure I didn’t forget what I was, and what happened to those that got too close to me. Faye tried to defend me, but even she couldn’t answer all its accusations. I know it’s just waiting for its chance to take control, and now that it has met Faye, it will use her in its schemes. She even…she gave it a name. Or rather allowed it to name itself. Famine it called itself. Famine explained briefly our relationship. It’s more complicated than the way it put it, but it was close enough for Faye to understand.
Finally, the conversation ran its course, and it allowed me to regain control, bring Faye back to the space between. There we sat and talked about everything she had seen. I was…in no mood to discuss it. I was ashamed of it. All of it. I knew Faye accepted it all, but I was ashamed of my sorry excuse none the less. I wanted to show her that it wasn’t all bad, that somewhere inside my head there was a normal human moment of happiness. But the truth was, there weren’t any. Not any she hadn’t seen anyhow. Still…there was one. The single night I’ve felt the most human. She had been there, but not from my perspective. I was something, so I took Faye for one more trip to experience the night we ended Kitsune from my perspective.
It did the trick. We both felt better afterward, and it explained how I felt better than I ever could in words. After that, I made a place for us to sleep. As we crawled into bed, I felt a lot better about the situation than I had before. Maybe there was a chance to make things different this time…maybe.
And then I woke up in the tent, which caught me off guard. It took me a moment to realize where I was, but then I remembered everything. Faye was already up, so I crawled out of the tent and did my best to put the thoughts out of my head. Mike and Zero wanted to go to Vermilion, so that’s where we headed.
There we found Dr. Ishitake and Ai. They were preparing for another expedition in their sub. Ishitake needed our help in collecting some water pokemon in the nearby kelp forest. It seemed like an easy enough job, but I was distracted by all the thoughts running through my head. While the others went to catch the pokemon, I hung back and made sure the sub was safe. I wasn’t in the mood to venture out. My head wasn’t in the game and I knew it. I watched the others capture pokemon while I thought about Mona and everything that had happened with her. Then I thought about Faye, and what could happen with her. I know getting close to me is dangerous, but I don’t have the strength to tell her not to. At least now she knows. She knows, but she still chose to stay, I can’t express how relieved and anxious that makes me. I was completely lost in thought for some time, but I finally snapped to. The others were almost done, and I told them to hurry. We finished up, and Ishitake brought us back to shore and gave us our reward.
After that we got lunch in Lavender, and talked for a bit. Again, I was feeling a bit introspective, so I remained relatively quiet throughout the meal. I did help Zero plan out his strategy for the next League tournament though. Once the meal was over, there was some indecision about what to do next. No one seemed to be in the mood to suggest an idea, so we all just sat around for a while. Eventually Mike decided to go back to Vermilion. Sean and Faye didn’t have a big enough flyer handy, so they decided to take the train, while Mike and I flew on ahead.
When we arrived we found Hakai sitting outside the PC. I talked to him while we waited for the others to arrive. Eventually Mike suggested going to the dock. There we found Ishitake in a near panic. Ai had gone missing while investigating the ocean floor and he didn’t have a way to search for her. He took us out on the research boat and gave us dive suits to hunt for her and the sub. We found the sub resting at the bottom of the sea floor; it was being attacked by a group of ancient pokemon. We battled and won relatively easily, although I did manage to piss of a Kabutops. Faye nearly had a panic attack, but I only sustained a minor scratch. Once we cleared the area, Hate and Helios managed to lift the sub back to the surface. There Ishitake thanked us for our help saving Ai and rewarded us.
I headed back to the island before the others. I took a walk on the beach with Whisper and did some thinking. I’m no there’s nothing to be done for the past, but I’m still bothered by it. The only thing I can try to do is make sure that history doesn’t repeat itself, and besides, Faye is different. Faye knows what I am, and accepts it. I wonder how much of this I should share, but I guess for now I’ll just try to put it behind me…
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Post by NinjaDeathStrike on Mar 27, 2011 21:44:57 GMT -5
Journal: I woke up alone in the tent this morning. Faye left a note saying she had to run some errands. Sean was gone too, so Mike and I tried to make breakfast, until I realized we didn’t have a way to start the fire. We went to the Lavender café instead, where we found the others. We all sat down and ate breakfast together. Then we decided to go to Vermilion and see how Dr. Ishitake and Ai were doing. When we went outside I noticed that Faye had caught a Tropius. Whatever she and Sean had got up to, it must have been somewhere sunny. The Tropius was really cool. I had always wanted one. When Faye offered me a chance to ride it I immediately took her up on it. Flying on Tropius was awesome. It smelled like summer.
When we got to Vermilion we went to check on Ishitake and the sub. He said he needed some replacement parts, so we went discount shopping at the junk yard to find him some. It took a while to find the pieces, and I had no luck at it. I cut my hand on a piece of glass. Mike seemed to have the most luck, and Sean caught some pokemon.
We returned the pieces to Ishitake and he got to work repairing the sub while we did some shopping. First we went back to Cold Subtopic. That stupid pig of an owner was eyeing Faye again, but he backed off quickly when he noticed me. Next we went to Posh, and upscale dress store. I picked out a nice suit and shirt combo, Sean found a suit that made him look like a federal agent, and Faye found a spring outfit that looked amazing on her. I think she was rather embarrassed when I told her so. Next up was a sports store where Zero bought an…interesting…black and white ensemble. We stopped by the TM shop too, but I didn’t need anything there, so I waited outside. Once our shopping spree was done, we went back to Vermilion to check on the sub.
Ishitake had finished his repairs. He was going to take the sub down to explore some ruins he had found. He wanted an escort, so of course we offered our services. The ride took us down deep. At the bottom of the ocean we found the city waiting. The entire thing had been wiped out by some catastrophe. We moved through it and into a massive temple that had been constructed at the center. The hallways were lined with Relicanth, which Sean caught, and treasure, which Zero eyed. Ishitake warned us not to touch anything. We soon arrived in the heart of the temple. It was contained in a massive glass doom. The room was literally breathtaking. Beautiful and terrible. Statutes lined the path to a pillar of water that contained a floating blue orb. Ishitake said this was what he had come for. He reached into the water and took it, despite our worries and his own warning not to touch anything.
And of course it didn’t go well. When he took the orb he released the temple’s guardians, a trio of Milotic. Zero and I battled one, while Mike, Sean, and Faye tried to catch the other two. We finished our battle in two rounds when I caught Milotic on my first try. The other battle wasn’t going so well. One of the Milotic had managed to set up rain dance and everyone was getting pummeled. I had Whisper help out, and Faye caught one of them, making the battle much more managable. Finally Sean got fed up and threw a master ball at the other, ending the fight.
When the guardians were captured the magic keeping the pillar in place gave way, causing the water to explode outwards and shattering the glass dome. Glass and stone began to fall as the whole temple collapsed around us. Most of us made it to safety, but Sean was pinned under one of the falling statues and Mike was knocked unconscious (again). I pulled Mike to safety psychically, but Faye…Faye ran BACK into the collapsing temple for Sean. She sent out Chance too, but still felt the need to put herself back in danger. Watching her run back into the temple nearly gave me a heart attack. Sean had everything under control, and Chance would have been fine on his own. There was NO reason for Faye to put herself in danger again. No reason except her foolhardy determination to sacrifice herself. I nearly ran back in myself, but having three people in danger would be even worse than two, so instead I had to watch helplessly from the sub. Luckily Sean and Faye made it back safely, but it was still an incredibly stupid thing to do. The more I thought about the angrier I was with her. There were plenty of ways she could have helped Sean without endangering herself. While we were waiting in the decompression chamber she noticed my frustration and gave me a questioning look, so I told her why I was upset. I tried to restrain my anger, but I was still rather firm. She seemed to understand at least, so hopefully it won’t happen again…but I won’t hold my breath.
After we got our reward, Ishitake seemed to be in a hurry to get rid of us so he could study the orb. I didn’t object, though Mike and Zero seemed interested in the orb’s potential. Still, we all headed back to the Island, except for Zero, who decided to stay in a PC.
Sean was already asleep beside Sparky when we got back, but Mike, Faye, and I stayed up talking for a long time after we got back. I finally got Mike to open up, if only briefly. The guy has been traveling with us for weeks, but barely ever talks. He shared a little bit of his past with us and talked about life in Hoenn. It sounds like a nice place. When I asked about his home though, he closed up again. We also talked about the potential of seeing Kyorge and other legendary pokemon. We talked a little bit more, and then headed to bed.
There were also the gifts. I saved them for last because I don’t really know what to say about them… As soon as we got back to the island…Faye gave me her Tropius. She just handed me his pokeball and said he was mine. I was so dumbstruck I couldn’t even process what was happening at first. Then I took the pokeball…and probably said something…I don’t really remember. I was still not thinking completely straight. And then, as if that wasn’t enough, when we were sitting by the fire Faye gave me another gift. She and Sean had gone to the beach in the morning…and she…she made me a bracelet. It has shark’s teeth and black pearls. I…that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. This is the first real gift I’ve ever gotten…the first one with any meaning behind it. It…made me feel happy. Happy sounds like such a stupid word to use, but it’s the only one that truly fit. I thanked her several times while we were by the fire, and smiled every time I looked at the bracelet for the rest of the night. Finally just before we fell asleep, I tried to tell her how much it meant one more time…and I think she finally understood. |
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Post by NinjaDeathStrike on Apr 2, 2011 5:59:51 GMT -5
Journal: Today…was not the best day. It was trying, on many different fronts. I woke up in the tent, shocked awake by the dreams again…like every other day. I went outside and found the others sleeping by the fire. When I shook Faye awake I noticed that her skin was unusually warm. She looked pale too. I asked if she was alright. She tried to tell us she was fine, but Sean noticed too. I touched her forehead even though she tried to back away. Her forehead was burning up. When we refused to back down, she admitted to not feeling well. Sean and I were able to talk some sense into her, and Sean made her a cold rag to try and break the fever, while I lectured her about trusting her friends. Trying to hide being sick was stupid and pointless and I was none too happy about it.
I let it go though, after Faye accepted our help Mike suggested seeing how Dr. Ishitake and Ai were doing with the orb. We all saddled up and headed for Vermilion. I could tell something was off before we even reached the city. The weather grew progressively worse, and by the time we reached Vermilion it was absolutely pouring. We found Ishitake in his lab and that’s where Zero nearly throttled him. Sean and I were able to get him to calm down, but Zero was right. This was all Ishitake’s doing. He had messed with powers he wasn’t equipped to deal with. I was perfectly fine to leave him to deal with his own mess, but the others said we should help him. I wasn’t going to argue. We all got back on the research boat and headed to sea. The waves slammed the boat the whole time and Faye’s fever continued to worsen. When we reached the site of the underwater city, a tidal wave engulfed the entire boat, nearly capsizing it…and then Kyorge emerged from the waves. It attacked, nearly destroying our entire party in a single hit. It also slammed into the side of the boat, sending Ai tumbling into the water. Ishitake dove in after her. Faye dove in after both of them, and Mike and I followed to help. Turns out I wasn’t needed though, as Mike and Faye managed fine without me. Sean actually managed to catch the damn thing, but he’ll have to tame it before he can use it in battle. It is NOT a happy camper right now. Still, when it’s tamed, it will be incredibly powerful.
After we collected our reward, we went to Saffron for lunch. Faye could barely stand from fever and exhaustion, and the rest of us were hungry too. Sean and I had to practically force Faye to eat. We did some quick shopping too, to get out of our wet clothes. Then we went to Cinnabar. The others wanted to speak to Fudo, I waited outside. When they exited, Zero and I decided to battle. He wanted the practice for the league, and I wanted to see if I stood a chance against him. The battle was going incredibly well for me. I managed to knock out Shadow early on, and was putting on quite a bit of pressure. Zero had Drago out, and I had Tiamat. I was ready to attempt a sweep of the rest of his team with her, but then things got a little out of hand. I ordered Taimat to use a water attack in the rain. It nearly killed Drago. We ended the battle there while Zero rushed Drago to the PC. Luckily, he lived. I felt pretty horrible about that. It was just supposed to be a practice match, but I got carried away. I was so focused on winning...I didn't think about making sure it was safe.
We went back to saffron after that. Zero retired to practice, and Sean went back to the island. Mike, Faye, and I ran across a land developer who was trying to acquire some property. He promised to help us with the house if we could convince some farmer to sell his land to the man. It sounded like an easy enough job. I could take his mind over and have him sign the deed in a matter of minutes. Of course it didn’t turn out to be that simple. Once we got there Faye said she wanted to hear the farmer’s side of the story, even though he slammed his door in our faces. He eventually let us in, and told us his side. Something about him not wanting to sell the land because his family had owned it for a long time. It didn’t make much sense to me, it seemed clear that the better offer was coming from the land developer, but both Faye and Mike wanted to help the farmer. I didn’t understand at all, but I also didn’t really care about the farmer OR the developer, so I just went along with them. Still, it would have been nice to have some neat stuff for our house. We helped find a new spot for the factory the developer wanted to build, and he quoted us a price for water and electric: 200,000P. Not cheap. The farmer offered to help us plant a garden. Woo-who.
Mike headed home after that, and Faye and I decided to make one more stop in Celadon to pick up some seeds for the garden. We got a variety of fruits and vegetables, as well as some trees and flowers. When we exited the shop, we ran into the man who owns Cold Sub topic. The man who’s always eyed Faye with those watery, hungry eyes. When he saw us he tried to run, but I stopped him. I read his mind…I shouldn’t have. The things I saw there were…disgusting. I wanted to kill him, badly. I needed a kill anyhow, what a better candidate than him? But Faye didn’t want me to. If she knew what I knew, If she saw what was in his head, she wouldn’t have stopped me. Still, I relented reluctantly, but I wouldn’t let him escape without punishment. I gave him something he deserved, and we flew back to the island.
Once we got there I was still fuming. My fist were balled so tightly they were going numb. Faye tried to calm me, but it took a while. I wanted to go back to Celadon, I wanted to kill. It had already been too long since my last one. I wanted him finished. Finally, I was able to let it go and sit down. We talked for a little bit and I felt better about the situation, for now. I’m still not happy about it, but I’ll do my best to live with it. Once I had cooled off we talked about the house some, and the garden. I felt better thinking about something positive. Finally we turned in, tomorrow Zero was going to become champion. I didn’t want to miss it. |
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Post by NinjaDeathStrike on Apr 3, 2011 6:52:04 GMT -5
Journal: Last night’s dreams were worse than they’ve been in a long time. He was there…leering at me. Taunting with his fat, sweaty fingers. I hunted him all through the night, but I couldn’t catch him. He escaped every time, and…I can’t finish the rest. It was horrible. I woke up feeling angry and frustrated. I was on the island, beside Faye. She was still warm with fever, so I left her a note as Mike and I headed to meet Zero. Sean was already gone, possibly training Kyorge. Mike and I met Zero just as he was getting ready to fly to the league. The three of us went together. Our seats weren’t as good this time, but we had a decent view.
Zero was really off in his first two matches. He made some really amateur mistakes and almost got knocked out early. I was incredibly frustrated with him. He was cable of better and if he didn’t pull his act together, he was going to lose again. Faye arrived after the second match, and Mike brought a bunch of girls over as well. He introduced them, but I wasn’t really paying attention. I was busy watching the match, and stewing over yesterday and my dream. Zero won his third victory more definitively. His third opponent used a pokemon I had never seen before, a weird three-headed dragon pokemon. Still, Zero won.
During the intermission, Mike and I went to get a snack. Mike asked me if I wanted him to set me up with one of the girls. I had to decline gracefully, and thankfully he let the subject drop without too many questions. I bought some funnel cakes and a huge stick of cotton candy for Faye. I sat down just as the championship bout began. The match was CLOSE, and by all rights Zero should have lost. But somehow, he managed to pull out a victory. Victor brought him the win, defeating the champion’s last two pokemon. It made me proud to watch Victor preform so well, and reminded me of the night all those months ago when Zero and I caught Victor and Nite together. We’ve both changed drastically since then, lost…and gained much. After his victory, Zero was nearly overwhelmed by the crowds. It took him a long time to come and find us. Faye and I met Sean outside of the stadium and Mike brought along his entourage of girls (I really should learn their names). Finally Zero was able to escape and we made it to Pewter, and then Saffron.
Zero chose a ‘western’ restaurant for dinner. ‘Western’ here meaning an abomination before gods and man. The inside looked like it had been decorated by a blind man who had only heard about America in whispered legends and drunken bar stories. The food was worse. Somewhere the founding fathers are rolling in their graves. I quickly ate a salad and excused myself. I had unfinished business and I was tired of being around people. I needed to hunt. The man from the store, the one who had assaulted Faye. I couldn’t get him off my mind all day. I still wanted him dead, badly. I asked Faye one more time to let me kill him, and at last she relented. I could tell she didn’t want to…but I needed this. I wasn’t going to be able to rest easy until I knew he had stopped breathing for good. I found him exiting his store in the market district. I quickly took control of his mind and had him follow me into an abandoned house. Once he was there, I released his mind, but kept his body immobile. I wanted to make sure he could feel it. I took his tongue first, to keep him quiet, then when to work on the rest. There was a lot of cutting to do. He passed out several times, but I always made sure to wake him up again. I wasn’t letting him take the easy way out. After more than an hour, I finally finished him, sinking my blade deep into his chest. It was deeply satisfying. I cleaned up the scene and headed back to the island.
I was the first one there, so I started a fire and waited for the others. Sean and Faye arrived first, and Sean headed to bed shortly after that. Zero was next, and then Mike, with the most annoying Shaymin ever. It wouldn’t leave me alone, eventually I had to have Whisper attack it. We talked about a lot sitting by the fire. First was the obvious battle and how Zero could defend his title. From there we got onto the subject of the house…and the sleeping arrangements…and at this point it became pretty obvious that Faye and I weren’t going to be able to keep our relationship under wraps for much longer. So we just came out with it. We were together. Mike took the whole thing in stride, but Zero for some reason didn’t believe me. Even when Faye confirmed it, he still looked at us like we were crazy. Finally it sunk in, and he seemed genuinely happy for us. Desperately trying to shift the focus of the conversation, we ended up talking about America. It was then that Mike brought up his desire to hunt down his brother’s killer again. Mike had a grand scheme to kill him with a legendary pokemon…but that didn’t seem like a good idea to me. Flashy murders wind up in jail. Only careful monsters live to kill another day. I should know, I’m a very careful monster. I wanted to offer Mike a few pointers, but that didn’t seem like a very good idea, so I mostly kept my mouth shut. By this time it was well past midnight and I could barely keep my eyes opened. Everyone headed to bed…but Faye and I needed to talk a little more.
I told her what I had done, even though she already knew. She seemed very…upset. More upset than she had been about any of the others. I started to worry. The cracks were showing. She couldn’t take it anymore. This was it, she was going to leave. I braced myself for it. Instead Faye blamed herself (typical Faye), even though I was the one who had killed the man. She felt like it was her fault that the man had died, just because he had met her. I couldn’t understand. That man made a choice to attack Faye, HE was the one who couldn’t control himself. He brought his fate upon himself. I tried my best to reassure Faye that if anyone was to blame it was me. And then I tried to put things into perspective for her, telling her how many people she had saved from me. How many good people were alive, because I met her. In the end though, we both just had to accept that what had happened, happened. We talked about a few lighter subjects, and finally drifted off to sleep side by side, ready to face what dreams may come. |
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